LIFE - THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHRISTIAN/HYPOCRITE

It's been a while since I've written. It's also been a while since I've heard from God. I'm not sure if that's because He quit talking to me or I was just too hurt to listen. But last night, I found myself begging. But this time was different, I wasn't begging for my kids back or the pain to stop or the truth to be revealed... I was simply begging for God. Begging for what He and I used to have. Begging for time alone with him.  Begging to hear Him. Begging for the relationship I had with Him before my whole life fell apart. Begging for Him to hear me. Begging for Him to care. Begging for Him to show me the way out. I fell asleep begging... And, I woke up in the middle of the night thinking about Lot and his wife after Sodom and Gomorrah burnt. I know right?!?! I mean who does that? Of all the things to be thinking about in this day and age, I'm thinking about Sodom and Gomorrah????? No wonder why people call me crazy! I could see if I had just had a ...

surrounded by people who don't understand what God has willed what God has planned incapable of seeing  the love that you hold too busy being evil and cold you're easy to blame when you're the odd man out and everyone else  is on the same old route headed toward destruction without a care and angry at you  for not being there you made it to safety swam to the shore nearly drowned  trying to save everyone else on board but still you try to do all that you can toss in the preserver  gripped tight in your hand you pray that they grab it and hold on tight but all they want is to continue to fight they think they are strong won't break and give in when really they're weak  and just want to win but what are they winning? what is the prize? the hatred and evil I see in their eyes? what does that profit? what does that gain? when choosing a life riddled with p...