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Showing posts from June, 2013

I love the way you lie

I'm sure most people have heard the song out by Eminem and Rihanna, but every time I hear it I am reminded of a poem I wrote several years ago when I was in an abusive relationship and at my end. So, I wanted to share it as an example of how God can fix anyone no matter how broken they are. Please remember my poem is sarcastic and not literal just as is the song I referred to. Take this knife and jab it in Here's another try again I'll find another if I need Just thrust it in and watch me bleed Do I sound a bit crazy to you? Please let me know if I do I just want you to know I love this game I love the hurt, I love the pain Please kick me down so I can get back up If I've had too much I'll say "enough" But I want you to ignore me if I do And kick me til I'm black and blue Go find some rocks, go find some stones Bruise my body, break my bones Don't stop until you feel my fear Don't stop until you see my tea

Research: "Sibling Torment Damaging" .... FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!

I was so happy to come across this article this morning. It's so awesome to see that someone else in the world sees truth and is trying to do something about it!  I was a victim of my sister my whole life and nobody would listen, I was just constantly told to stop my whining. Then, when I couldn't take it any more, I would blow up (you know fight or flight, when flight didn't work I'd try the other). Yet, all anyone would ever see is my blowing up and they would blame me and tell me to just shut my mouth, get over it, and forgive. They would say that things were just fine and normal and then I'd start screaming. Yeah, because fine and normal to them meant me being constantly controlled or abused! Just like the article says, I was the youngest so I took it from everyone. Any time I'd open my mouth someone would tell me to shut it or make fun of me. It was everyone trapped in the cycle, not just my sister, but their treatment of me taught her that I was an acc

Are you overwhelmed by life?

Then let me give you some perspective :) Starting with verse 3, Genesis 5 collapses into nothing more than a litany of numbers and outdated names: When Adam had lived 130 years, he had a son in his own likeness, in his own image; and he named him Seth. After Seth was born, Adam lived 800 years and had other sons and daughters. Altogether, Adam lived 930 years, and then he died. When Seth had lived 105 years, he became the father of Enosh. And after he became the father of Enosh, Seth lived 807 years and had other sons and daughters. Altogether, Seth lived 912 years, and then he died. When Enosh had lived 90 years, he became the father of Kenan, Enosh lived 815 years and had other sons and daughters.... From there, you plug in new names and different numbers, but that's pretty much the chapter. Some guy first becomes a father at an age well beyond qualifying for the AARP, and then he proceeds to produce more sons and daughters on his way to death's door. In an era before politi

Tonight I'm sitting at home digging up bones ; )

Tonight I picked up a book which I had read before, "Who Switched off My Brain?" by Dr. Caroline Leaf, and began to skim through it when something particular caught my eye. "The important thing to be aware of here is that suppressed emotional pain does not just disappear. It can turn into lingering physical pain. We should never tell boys not to show their tears and make comments like 'cowboys don't cry.' Just like adults when children suppress their feelings, it affects their physical well-being. Dealing with toxic thoughts is not a luxury; it's a necessity. You can pretend and bury your emotions, but you need to know that you are burying something that remains alive and can affect your physical health for years to come." Let me share an analogy with you here to help you understand and, forgive me, but it actually came to me through a Randy Travis song, "Diggin up Bones." If a dog buries a bone in a yard it will remain there until it i

THIS IS VERY SCARY!!! BE SURE IT DOESN'T HAPPEN TO YOU!

A woman was driving home alone one evening when she noticed a man in a large truck following her. Growing increasingly fearful, she sped up, trying to lose her pursuer, but it was futile. She then exited the freeway and drove up main street, but the truck stayed with her, even running red lights to do so.  In a panic, the woman wheeled into a service station, jumped from her car and ran inside screaming. The truck driver ran to her car, jerked the back door open and pulled from the floor behind her seat a man that was hiding there. The lady was fleeing from the wrong person. She was running from her savior! The truck driver, perched high enough to see into her back seat, had spied the would-be rapist and was pursuing her to save her, even at his own peril. As was this lady's, the perspective of an unbelievers is distorted pursuit. People run from the pursuit of a God who is desiring to save them from destruction. Those of us who know Him realize we love God because He first loved

It's always so neat when you know you are reaping something...

It's always so neat when you know you are reaping something... Today, my husband and I took our youngest to the Dairy Queen and a man, who was clearly homeless, rode up on his bike with a pizza. There were some young girls starting at him and making fun of him and my heart just broke for him; but since I was already sad, I didn't bother to reach out to him like I normally would. However, he reached out to me. As we were sitting there keeping to ourselves, he began to talk to us. I still did not even really look at him out of fear of crying but Cory politely responded and chatted with him. Then, he got up and came to our table and gave our daughter a piece of his pizza. He said it was his 60th birthday and he was celebrating with pizza and ice cream. I realized how most people would have taken that gesture but I knew how priceless it was. This man took a risk of being rejected and ridiculed to show us love. He didn't have much but what he did have he felt led to share with

I'm done being careful!

It’s funny how you can read or hear the same scripture a thousand times and then you catch something that you have never noticed in it before. Philippians 4:6 has got to be one of the most popular verses in the Bible, but yesterday when I read it I caught something different than usual. It starts with “Be careful for nothing” (KJV). Not too recently I was wondering about this very topic. Very often when we go to Walmart we don’t make it home with all of our bags. I usually just overlook the loss and just trust God to make it up to me in the future because the missing items are usually so minor compared to the stress and the gas money to drive back and deal with it. However, the last time it was a bag full of some pretty expensive merchandise so I was really upset and began to talk to God about how they should have a better bagging system. Then, God dealt with me about why I reaped that loss and after I repented for the mistake He gave the items back. It occurred to me that if I truly